Thursday, January 10, 2013
Purse Thursday - Kelsey
I am interviewing the purses of women again and again. These women do not know they are going to be interviewed, so catching them and their purse in their utmost natural presence is very important. I'm excited to learn more about the fashions and styles of women, see how much stuff they carry around, and just how clean or nasty they are. Shall we? The other night Kelsey needed a place to hang for a few hours before heading over to a show at The Comet. She came over to meet my lady for some pre funk drinks, turkey meatballs, and girl talk. I was stuck sitting very quietly at the dinner table while these two ranted and raved through their daily gossips. Luckily for me, I had a tightly rolled joint and a new box full of records to keep me occupied. Hours later, Kelsey realized she was way too high to make it to the show and I took this opportunity to dump her purse belongings onto the table. Radjaw: Can I see what's in your purse? Kelsey: Sure, it's not like I'm in a rush anymore! Radjaw: Where did you get the purse? Kelsey: Port Angeles Vintage Mall. It was overpriced ($25) but I didn't care, I really liked it. Radjaw: Is it your everyday bag? Kelsey: Yeah. I've used it since the day I got it two months ago. Radjaw: What kind of bag? Kelsey: It's Aqua Madonna and as you can see all the hair is gone. It used to be covered in fur!! But now it's sad and kinda ghetto. Radjaw: That is sad. That is really sad. But what is inside?! - Fingerless glove - Revlon lipstick - 3 pronged outlet converter - 2 EmergenC raspberry lemonade packets - Cellphone - Obama matchbook - Dog leash & collar Radjaw: Do you have a dog? Kelsey: No, I don't. Sometimes I am with my best friend's dog, Coby. I have that just in case I need it. Radjaw: Do you like dogs that wear dresses? Kelsey: Dogs in dresses are great. Dogs in anything are pretty much fucking great. Put some rain boots on them, whatever! Radjaw: I recently bought a dog a football jersey with his name on it. Kelsey: I recently watched two dogs hump each other while wearing dresses. Mark was humping Seabass, he was asking for it. If you dress like a slut, you get treated like one, right? - Headphones - Keys - Other fingerless glove - Single car key Kelsey: That's the van key from my work that I will never return. - More lipstick - Django movie ticket stub - 5 bobby pins - Sealed locket Radjaw: What's in the locket? Kelsey: Nothing. It is glued shut! My friend fixed it and sealed it forever before I could put something inside of it. It's like a sad tomb. - Chapstick - Coin purse - A bunch of change Kelsey: There's change all over the place! Radjaw: How much? Kelsey: There's a bunch all on the bottom of the purse just swishing around. Radjaw: Why not use the coin purse? Kelsey: It's vintage, used to be my grandmother's. It has a ripped hole in the side so none of the change stays in it. Radjaw: Maybe you should use the change to buy a new one? Kelsey: This was my grandmother's. Radjaw: Get it repaired? - Andrew Johnson matchbook - Glasses cloth - Starbucks holiday stamp card Kelsey: I only go there because it's near my work! I also got this receipt from Ross for this stupid thing that I'm hoping to return. I'm afraid they won't take it back because this receipt looks like it was raped or something. - Camel Lights - Ring - SAM gift card - Lollia shea butter lotion Kelsey: I really didn't think my purse was that interesting until I pulled everything out. Radjaw: Is that everything? Kelsey: Just some more change. It'd be awesome if I still had my loaded gun in there! Radjaw: Can I have a cigarette? Kelsey: Yes.